Word of Salvation – Vol.41 No.42 – November 1996

 

Ask For And Offer Forgiveness

 

Sermon by Rev A L Van Drimmelen on Matthew 5:21-26

Scripture Readings: Matthew 5:21-26; 18:21-35; James 5:13-20

Suggested Hymns:

BOW 329; 25:1-4; 51A:1-3; 185; 426; 523

 

Congregation of our Lord Jesus Christ.

When our Lord taught about forgiveness, He stressed our responsibility to both look for and offer forgiveness.  When we have offended someone we must ask for forgiveness.  When someone has offended us, then we must be prepared to offer forgiveness.

As far as I am aware, the Christian church is the only organisation on this earth that specialises in that.  In a sense we have a monopoly on forgiveness.  When we focus on confession of sin – and then make it our business to forgive sin – then we are doing what the Head of the Church has done for us.  That is what the Christian church does best.

Of all the organisations and associations that exist, it is the church alone that knows how to confess sin.  Forgiveness is what our world needs so much today.

Time and time again you hear of unforgiving people – people who have grown cold and calloused to the warmth that surrounds forgiveness.  It is so hard for them to offer forgiveness.

Then there are people who always carry the oppressive burden of guilt and shame for their sin.  They find it so difficult to ask for forgiveness.

Relationships go wrong – there are generations of people who can’t get along together – countries and whole nations of people are in dispute – all of them need forgiveness – both to ask for it and offer it.

So, inside the church we make it our business to be different.  We must specialise in forgiveness.  It is not beyond anyone of us to both give and receive forgiveness from one another.

And so, if fellowship in the church ever breaks down – it is a fairly safe conclusion to make that forgiveness, or rather the lack of it, was the contributing factor.

To be faithful in the matter of forgiveness God provides for the means of grace.  We receive God’s grace to us in the Word and sacraments.  Word and sacraments together teach us – no, even more, they are a visible reminder to us – of God’s forgiveness in Christ given to us.

It is as if God in heaven is so concerned with His church on earth below, that he will remind us again and again.  He knows our need.  He knows how quick we are to forget.  He does something about it, both through the Word and sacrament.  It is His grace which makes forgiveness so real.

So, be refreshed in your own understanding this morning/evening.

1. What do you do when you have offended someone?

Place yourself in Jerusalem during Jesus’ day.  You’re standing before the altar, inside the temple, where a priest prepares to sacrifice an animal for the forgiveness of your sins.  You live with the weight of the laws of Moses on your mind – “an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.”  So you have come to make restitution for your sins.

Suddenly, the face of a friend, whom you have offended, pops into your mind.  You have avoided reconciliation for weeks.  And here you are at a worship service.  What would you do?  Ask the priest to forgive you?  Go ahead with your sacrifice?

You know what Jesus says, don’t you?  “Leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother, then come and offer your gift” (Mt 5:24).

Amazing, isn’t it?  A healthy relationship with God requires a healthy relationship with other believers.  Any sacrifice to God requires a sacrifice of ego, pride and self-righteousness when dealing with others.

Weaken the horizontal relationships, and the vertical relationship begins to wobble.  The vertical relationship is established on the saving work of Jesus Christ.  He is the one-and-for-all-time sacrifice for all our sins.  But our understanding of that is under threat when we are out of fellowship with one another.

Effectively, we undermine Christ’s sacrifice.  The foundation begins to shake when we fail to live the forgiveness we have received from God.  Then our worship is seriously compromised, sin gets a foothold.  Jesus commands it, “first, go and be reconciled.”  Notice the urgency in verse 24: “Don’t waste another minute.  Leave your offering; it will keep.  First go and be reconciled…!”

The word ‘reconciled’ suggests: “that a man had to do his utmost to put things right himself before he could be right with God.”  In Romans 12 Paul teaches: “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone” (vs 18).

When I offend someone, I am responsible to initiate reconciliation by asking for that person’s forgiveness.  And that is something I can’t go into half-heartedly, or superficially.  Whenever we seek a brother’s or sister’s forgiveness, we need to go all the way with complete honesty and a commitment to make things right.  Otherwise, we’ll have consequences to face.

Jesus says, “Settle matters quickly with your adversary who is taking you to court.  Do it while you are still with him on the way, or he may hand you over to the judge, and the judge may hand you over to the officer, and you may be thrown into prison.  I tell you the truth, you will not get out until you have paid the last penny” (vss 25-26).

Refusing to look for forgiveness brings spiritual “imprisonment” – no rest and no release in our innermost soul.

2. What do you do when someone has offended you?

Let’s turn the tables.  Suppose you’re the offended person.  Your neighbour borrows your lawn mower and returns it with a chipped blade.  Or, a friend betrays your confidence.  Or, the boss promotes a less experienced employee over you.  The pastor forgets your name – two weeks in a row.  Your partner remembers your birthday – the day after.

None of these offences would cause any of us to spontaneously gush forth with forgiveness, would they?  “Hey, I forgive you..!” So, what’s the proper response?

Once again, let’s seek guidance from our greatest Forgiver, the Lord Jesus.  From the well-known passage in Matthew chapter 18, we hear ourselves speaking when Peter asks the Lord, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me?  Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times” (Mt 18:21-22).

Peter must have thought, “seven times – that’s going beyond the call of duty.”  The Pharisees, after all, taught that an offended person need only forgive a brother three times.  Peter doubled that and added one.  But he was still way off.  “Try seventy times that amount,” Jesus responded.

You can’t help but wonder if Peter’s jaw dropped when he did the calculation.  “There’s not that much forgiveness in the whole entire world!”  But true forgiveness, as Jesus then illustrated in the parable of the unforgiving servant, doesn’t come from this world.  It originates with God Himself, who pardons our sins through the saving work of Jesus.  In that parable Jesus gives a vivid picture of forgiveness in Christ.  As sinners, we come to God with nothing but debt and no way to purchase salvation.  Our debt increases day by day – “the wages of sin is death.”  Who can save us from that death?  Jesus, rich in His mercy and compassion, cancels our debt.  God says, “My Son paid it for you on the cross – believe in Him, and your account with Me is settled.”

With God as our model, forgiving others should come naturally for us, right?  Not always.  Did you notice how quickly the servant forgot the way the king graciously forgave him?  “But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii.  He grabbed him and began to choke him.  ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ ne demanded.  His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.’ But he refused.  Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt” (vss 28-30).

The nerve of that first servant!  After his ten million dollar debt was wiped off the books, he refused to let his fellow servant off the hook for a measly twenty dollars

But hold on.  Before judging him too harshly, let’s face up to how often we do the same thing.  Christ’s death covers all of our sins, no matter how severe.  That cover is for every day, every moment of our lives.  We sing songs and choruses that boast the fact that we are loved – and forgiven.

Yet, we sometimes want to squeeze every last drop from those who “owe” us.  So we withhold “hellos” from our careless neighbour until he buys a new blade for the mower.  We resent the boss for overlooking us.  We’ll never like another of the pastor’s sermons until he remembers our name.  And we give the silent treatment to the forgetful spouse.

Ironically, when Christians withhold forgiveness they usually inflict more pain on themselves than on the one who needs to be forgiven.  They know they have been forgiven by their Father in heaven – and yet they find it so hard to forgive others.

Jesus likened this to torture – a self-imposed torture – one for which the only release is to forgive as you have been forgiven by your Father in heaven.

God is so committed to our forgiving one another that He’ll make us miserable if we refuse to forgive.  One commentator describes our torment as “the acid of resentment and hate, eating away at our peace and calmness.”

Giving forgiveness is much healthier than withholding it.  It brings inner peace to both the forgiver and the forgiven.  Forgiveness strengthens the bond between believers.

3. What happens when you give and receive forgiveness?

James emphasised the healing power of forgiveness by including confession as an essential element of church life – no less important than prayer or worship.  “Is any one of you in trouble?  He should pray.  Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.  The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective” (James 5:13, 16).

James isn’t advising each of us to publicly read our personal list of sins to the congregation on Sunday mornings (see 1Cor.14:40).  Such a practice, however helpful for confessor, would create all kinds of problems – betrayal of confidences, embarrassment, suspicion, to name just a few.  Rather, he’s urging us to confess our sins to one another – person to person – so that healing can occur.

The next time our church’s fellowship starts to break down, ask yourself if you need to confess any sins to a fellow believer or if you need to forgive the sins of another.  And get to work on those bridges.  Bridges that build relationships last and last because they rest on no other foundation than our ability to forgive and be forgiven – both to ask for and to offer forgiveness.

“Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God” (Rom 15:7).  Our acceptance of one another is in Christ; in how we remember Him – in the Word – in the signs and seals to us of broken bread and poured out wine.  That is acceptance!  That is being the church!  After all, that is what I like about being in the church today.  Where else could I go to confess my sins and know that I am forgiven?

We might even try hanging out a sign prior to worship: WELCOME TO OUR CHURCH.  FORGIVENESS REQUIRED FOR WORSHIP

Be a forgiver of sins.  Be a confessor of sins – to God and to man – so that you can worship.

King David knew what it was like to hang around and carry the load of guilt.  He found relief in confession.  “When I kept silent about my sin, my body wasted away through my groaning all day long” (Ps 32:3-5).

Each one of us must own up to his or her sinfulness.  Each one of us must admit their helplessness, their weakness, their need.  Yes, this is the negative side…  but it is a necessary side.

Guilt wants to stay hidden.  It loves the dark corners of our personality.  Like a termite, it eats and destroys when hidden, but, when brought to the light, it dries up and dies.  Confession is a gift from God.  Without it, we would strain under the weight of our guilt.  Have you developed a habit of heartfelt confession?  Why not start now?  If you know Christ personally, you need not fear His condemnation (see Rom 8:1).

Nothing you say will drive Him away.  He listens to the worst of sinners without wincing.  And if your time with the Saviour reveals anything that needs to be confessed to a fellow believer, do it.  You’ll be amazed at how much your load lightens.

What a blessing to belong in fellowship with a church like that.

Amen.