Word of Salvation – February 2010

 

EDUCATING WITH A PROMISE – John Westendorp

 

Text – Proverbs 22:6

Reading – Deuteronomy 6:1-9, 20-25 & Proverbs 22:1-16

Singing – BoW 103b / 494 / 78a / 156

 

Introd: Education has changed a great deal since the days when I went to school.

Sure, the basic three R’s are still being taught to our children. But a fourth ‘R’ has been added.
’Reproduction’ has joined reading, ‘riting and ‘rithmatic as basic to the curriculum.
Teaching about the ‘birds and the bees’ was originally left to Mum and Dad at home.
But many of us Mums and Dads abdicated our responsibility.
So it was left to the school to tell the kids where they came from.

 

Another difference is that education has become much more ‘value free’.
When I was at school there was still a clear consensus about morality.
That meant that at school there were clear boundaries between right and wrong.

In today’s politically correct culture, most values are up for debate.
Discipline has become more difficult… behaviour more outrageous.
And the lessons on the ‘birds and the bees’ now teach homosexuality as a valid option.

 

A third difference is that schooling has become more religiously neutral.
State Education was always supposed to be religiously neutral.
But that basically meant that schools favoured neither Catholic nor Protestant.

Yet every Monday we still took an oath of allegiance to honour God and the queen.
And the meaning of Christmas and Easter were often taught and celebrated.
Today many teachers are more likely to emphasise Halloween.

 

God’s Word has quite a bit to say about education too.
It leaves us as parents in no doubt about our duty.
Our text calls on parents to take seriously the education of their children.

 

A] RESPONSIBLE CHILD REARING.

 

1. So what’s involved in “training up a child in the way he should go”.

Some people argue that this training only has to do with good behaviour… with moral standards.
So we parents are expected to teach our children to be good boys and girls.
We don’t want feral kids… so we train them to be obedient.

It’s true that this is an important part of what our text intends to convey.
Teach good behaviour from the beginning and it will impact the child’s whole of life.
And yet… by itself this falls far short of what Proverbs means.

 

Some people would add to this training in moral behaviour also Bible stories… religious teaching.
We as parents are expected to teach our children that Jesus died for our sins.
We don’t want our kids growing up ignorant about the gospel.

And it’s true… for Christians these things are absolutely vital.
We know that if we teach these things to our kids it will shape their lives into godly people.
And yet… even that still falls far short.

 

When our text says: Train a child in the way he should go…
then it is speaking about the total direction or the child’s life.
A training that involves every area of life… where nothing is excluded.
It is aimed… not just at good behaviour… and not just at the child’s faith…!
It is aimed at the whole of his walk along the pathway of life.

 

2. Let me demonstrate how broad the training is that is meant by our text.

Because some of you may be struggling with what I’ve said so far.
Surely the Bible is first of all interested in our relationship with God.
And morality… isn’t that a matter of behaving the way God wants us to?
Shouldn’t that be the training we are to give our children?

So what on earth has this got to do with wider issues of education?
Aren’t the three R’s another matter altogether?
Reading, writing and arithmetic… that’s the school’s business.
The fourth and fifth R’s… religion and reproduction… parents can sort that out.

 

Firstly let me remind you that in Scripture this talk about “a way in which to go” refers to a lifestyle.
There is a way that is God’s way and there is a way that isn’t.
Twice Proverbs says: There is a way that seems right to a man but its end is the way of death.
The right way is God’s way.
That means serving Him with all our heart, soul and strength… with all our being.
It’s going the way God wants us to go in every area of life.
In N.T. terms… we might say that it is to be a follower… a disciple of Jesus… totally.

 

That is reinforced by other passages of Scripture. For example we also read from Deuteronomy 6.
God there gives Israel a summary of His commandments.
We are to love God with all our being… to serve Him totally with heart, soul and strength.

And then the Lord adds: Impress them on your children…!
And we say: “Impress what on our children? Some morals? Some religion?”
No! All of God’s will… all of His decrees that cover all areas of life!
In following chapters God spells it out: there are laws for health… and work… and family life.

 

In Colossians 3:17 the apostle Paul makes that same point that…
We are to do everything we do… also the educating of our children… in the name of Jesus.
Because Jesus said that He is The Way and all of life is to be lived in Him.

 

3. This broad scope of child training is also brought out by the Hebrew word used here.
The particular Hebrew word for ‘training’ is used only a dozen times in the Bible.

In every other instance – except here in Proverbs – it has a very specialised use.
In Deuteronomy the word is used for dedicating a house that you build.
You build the house and then you dedicate it.
Today’s secular society often does that with a house warming party.
In Biblical times (and still today in some families) it is done with prayer.

In the book of Kings and Chronicles it is the temple that is dedicated to God.
And the altar in the temple… and the offerings were all dedicated to God.
In Nehemiah’s time we read of the wall of the city being dedicated.
And now strangely… the same Hebrew word is used only here for training children.

 

But that’s not odd… think of the parallels.
Here were buildings and other things… dedicated to the service of God.
And now we are to dedicate our children into the way they should go.
We strive to train up a child to be dedicated as a living temple of God.
And then we think of the NT teaching that the Christian is a temple of the Holy Spirit.

 

So we’re not just talking about training our children to be good moral people.

Nor just to make them religious and familiar with the Bible.
We want all of that for them but more: to become dedicated to Jesus in everything they do.

 

B] WHO IS TO DO THIS TRAINING.

 

1. We also need to ask the question: who is to do this training?

I want to ask that because our text doesn’t spell it out.

It’s just a general statement about the training of children in general.

 

So this could be applied to everyone involved in the work of child rearing:
The local school and its teachers… the church and its leaders;
The leaders of Cadets and GEMS… Sunday School teachers.
In all these ways we are to train up children in the way they should go.

 

However, in the book of Proverbs the context is THE HOME .
That is always the first priority.
Most of Proverbs was written by a father to his son.
So it is parental training of the children that we are talking about.

 

We saw that in Deuteronomy 6 too. Parents are called there to talk to their children.
They are to impress God’s all-embracing commands on their kids.
The N.T. repeats this principle in Ephesians 6:4.
So the first and ultimate responsibility for training is always the parents.

In fact Ephesians 6 especially calls Fathers to train up their children.
As I read it fathers are held accountable by God in a way that mother’s aren’t.
That doesn’t let Mum off the hook… but Dads, you need to take this seriously.

 

Responsibility for this total-all-of-life training is yours and mine.
It begins and ends with us – regardless as to who may help us in that task.
So we need to work out the implications that flow from this.

 

2. It is a common argument today that it’s the State’s responsibility to train our children.

Some are very strong on that point.
They argue that children need to find their place in this society.
And they will have to live by this society’s standards.
So ultimately the State must educate our kids.
Parents can teach them religion… and some private morality.
But how on earth can parents ever train their kids in technology like computers?
So, apart from morals and religion the State is best equipped to educate.

 

We can admit that today we have some wonderful educational institutions.
And they are equipped to teach in a way most Christian parents never ever could.
But that does not allow parents to abdicate their responsibility.
Scripture shows that the buck stops with you the parent.

In fact the State today cannot give the kind of God-centred training Scripture calls for.
It cannot teach our kids how to do everything we do in the name of the Lord Jesus.
It cannot train a child how to walk in God’s ways as a Christian businessman.
It is impossible for the State to train a child how to be a Christian doctor or Christian chemist.

 

State education sets out to be religiously neutral… but the problem is that it rarely is.
Often the presuppositions and the principles that come through are anti-Christian.
The ideas that usually dominate are humanism… and religious atheism.
Okay, it‘s wonderful that in the State Schools there are Christian teachers who buck the trend.
But over and over the idea that comes out is that we are merely highly evolved animals.
We were not made in God’s image… we’re merely the result of a chance collision of atoms.
So we’re not accountable to God… only to ourselves.

 

3. So how do we put all this together?

On the one hand the bottom line is that God holds us parents responsible for training our children.

Om the other hand we obviously need a lot of help from professionals in today’s complex world.

 

We who have our kids at State schools need to deal with this by working hard on the home front.
In rare instances our kids will have Christian teachers… (Great!) but more often they won’t.
So as parents we make sure that our children are trained in the way they should go.
We work hard to counteract the false religions taught in our public schools.

Help your child stand up to the teachings that we evolved from monkeys. Oppose Halloween.
If the school pushes human autonomy, train them instead to do everything in Jesus’ name.
So that they will keep doing that as welders and secretaries, as mechanics and nurses.

 

Others among us deal with this by opting for home schooling.
It’s a difficult way – although today there are many resources to help home-schoolers.
These parents keep the training of their children in their own hands for as long as possible.
The idea is to give them that solid training before they go into secular colleges and universities.

 

Thirdly there are those who have their children at Christian schools.
That’s a wonderful privilege for those who are able to avail themselves of it.
Here are schools that do more than teach morals and add a little religion to the curriculum.
Instead they bring all that is taught under the rule of King Jesus.

But my concern is that sometimes we become too comfortable with our Christian schools.
We know our kids will get taught morals and religion and a Christian outlook on life.
And so we send them off to the local Christian school without too much further thought.
It’s easy to abdicate our responsibility and leave it all to the Christian school.
The school is only there to help you to train up your child in the way he should go.

 

C] MAKING THE CONNECTION.

 

1. Let’s also consider briefly the connection made in our text: Godly parents must train their children.

But there is added to that a connection… a link that looks like a kind of promise.
If we do that training then the child will not turn from that when he is older.
Let me make a comparison: As a kid I hated Brussels Sprouts… but I was made to eat them.
Today I eat them willingly because I was trained to eat them.
Many will eat only junk food. Why? Because they were never trained to eat anything else.
That connection applies even more to behaviour and lifestyle issues.

 

Today there is the common view that says: Don’t indoctrinate your kids.
Let them make up their own minds when they grow up.
Some people today even want to get us on a guilt trip for brain washing our kids.
They argue that we are raising another generation of narrow-minded bigots.

 

Our text… which is God’s wisdom… flies in the face of that.
It implies that letting children choose later on for themselves doesn’t work.
If you don’t train them in the right way then they most probably will never walk in it.
Because the world around us is actively training our kids to walk in other ways.
The devil never says: I’ll leave your kids alone till they can make up their own minds.
He has no hesitation in training them in the evil ways that he wants them to walk.

 

Now, of course, God is gracious.
He often brings into His Kingdom people who were not trained in God’s ways.
But the point is that you may not presume on that. Only as you teach them about Jesus…
and about His ways may you expect your children to love and serve Him.

 

2. Sadly, there many parents today who have never understood this connection.

They pretty much let their children do what they want and expect them to turn out okay.
Their kids run wild in crèche and kindy… and they are feral at school.
And then much to their surprise those same kids become rebels as teenagers.
These parents are shocked when the police bring their kids home in a paddy wagon.
They can’t understand how their kids could get in into prostitution and drugs.
They are surprised and horrified when those same kids even turn on them their parents.

 

We often hear a lot about delinquents… juvenile delinquents… and delinquent teenagers.
But our text reminds us that there are two sides to that story.
We shouldn’t talk too much about delinquent kids unless we also talk about delinquent parents.
Parents who expect their children to walk in the right ways.
But who never do much training to make sure that it actually happens.

 

Our Aussie way of life is to live by the motto: She’ll be right mate!
And many parents apply that to the upbringing of their children too.
A problem? “No worries, they’ll grow out of it. She’ll be right mate!”
Until they wake up one day to find out too late that “she’s NOT all right mate!”

 

Parents, please understand this connection… begin early with the training of your children..
Our text doesn’t mention an age at which to start.
And it seems to me that it leaves it open because it’s never too early to start.
The Jesuits in the Catholic Church used to have a saying:
Give us a child till he’s seven and then the devil can have him.
They knew that they had trained him so that he would not depart from that training.

 

3. At this point we also have to honestly face the problem of prodigal sons and daughters.

Not all delinquent children are the product of delinquent parents.
Some parent sacrificed much time and effort to train their kids in the fear of the Lord.
Repeatedly they pointed them to Jesus and called them to repent and believe the gospel.

Those parents would readily admit that they did their training with many failings.
But they also did it with much devotion and love for the Lord and His Kingdom.
But today they face the heartbreak of seeing their children live in unbelief and sin.

 

Doesn’t this make Proverbs 22:6 a bit of a hit and miss affair?
No! It reminds us that what we have here is certainly not an infallible RULE.
Here I want to qualify the word ‘promise’ that I used earlier.
In a sense this is a promise… but not in the sense that it works automatically.

 

Proverbs is part of what we call ‘wisdom’ literature… this is the wise way to do things.
It is not wisdom to let kids grow up without training.
The way of wisdom is to nurture them in the Bible and in the gospel.
And normally… normally we can expect this way of wisdom to bring results.
But at the same time we have to allow for sin and rebellion in the human heart.
Prodigal sons and daughters are accountable for their own actions.
And God will judge them with greater severity if they were trained in God’s ways.

 

Yet even here we don’t need to despair… because God is faithful and loving.
And sometimes the fruit of Christian education only blossoms many, many years later.
Sometimes only after the parents have already left this earthly life.

 

I knew a young lady from a Christian home who shut God out of her life and married an unbeliever.
But at the funeral of her God-fearing father the Lord dealt with her in a saving way.
She had been trained in the way she should go… and now she does not turn from it.
Let’s be diligent in our responsibility so that in due course we may also reap the blessing. Amen